I’ve been blogging for over a year now and I’ve become quite fond of it. I developed such an affinity towards it I finally found the courage to submit some of my work to different companies in hopes of landing a freelance writing job. Well, as I mentioned in a previous post, ACTUALLY writing material is quite difficult. I wrote a few less than mediocre samples for an LA Blog, which I am so embarrassed for submitting. I wrote entries about the LA I envisioned and the LA I live in, my superior ability to write sitcoms, and the mid-twenties expectation hangover. Hmm, tantalizing stuff right? Zzzzzzzz. I put myself to sleep with it. I even had to submit five future article ideas, all of which were ludicrous and the one I can think of was a piece about the charismatic conversations I have with beautiful women in my head and the verbal diarrhea that comes out of my mouth. Yawn, dime a dozen ideas Jesse, dime a dozen.

Despite my aprehensions, I am going to post the “Sitcom” entry I submitted (some of which may sound familiar from an earlier post).

“Since when are you writing?”-Jerry Seinfeld

“We are talking about a sitcom!”-George Costanza

I walk around everyday and think, “My life would make an excellent sitcom.” As a self proclaimed expert on sitcoms, I have fool proof knowledge about what makes a good sitcom. I have a close set of friends to converse with and have major plot lines, a crazy friend that everyone can relate to, I have job troubles, definitely have money troubles, and most importantly, sexual tension between a co-worker/friend. Cast a few above average looking actors, write in a few witty one liners, and make sure to keep the sexual tension high. Pure genius, call up the networks and spark up the bidding war.

While it’s obviously not this easy, I wonder how hard it actually is to write a sitcom. Have you watched television lately? What were the pilots that never made it on air? Oh my god, what crap did the executives have to sift through in order to get to our current crop of television shows. I defy any studio executive to give me a shot at writing a sitcom for them. I will make them looking amazing! Their fellow executives will say, “Where did you find this guy?”

“You are brilliant for seeing this kid’s talent!”

“You have single handily brought back Thursday night television.”

“I hear pay raise.”

Who wants to jump on my bandwagon and make two careers, theirs and mine? Anyone? Hello? Anyone listening?

I didn’t post that in a self-deprecating manner so people will comment, “Oh Jesse, that’s amazing.” I just know people will be curious and will bug me to read what I submitted (okay that last part was my ego talking). If anyone does post a comment saying it’s amazing (and you’re not my mother) then I may think you’re an idiot.

Since this post didn’t make anyone laugh, I’ve embedded Flight of the Conchords’ “Business Time” video that is sure to make everyone chuckle.